‘He was struggling with his breath. I sat beside him and sang’: the choir who sing to people on their deathbeds; The Guardian, December 12, 2025

Fiona Sturges , The Guardian; ‘He was struggling with his breath. I sat beside him and sang’: the choir who sing to people on their deathbeds

"It’s a brisk November afternoon in the village of South Brent in Devon and, in a daffodil yellow cottage, two women are singing me lullabies. But these aren’t the sort of lullabies that parents sing to their children. They are songs written and sung for terminally ill people, to ease them towards what will hopefully be a peaceful and painless death.

We are at the home of Nickie Aven, singer and leader of a Threshold Choir. Aven and her friend are giving me a glimpse of what happens when they sing for people receiving end-of-life care. These patients are usually in hospices or in their own homes being supported by relatives, which is why 67-year-old Aven – who is softly spoken and radiates warmth and kindness – has asked me to lie down on the sofa under a rug while they sing. She says I can look at them, or I can close my eyes and allow my mind to drift. In fact, my eyes settle on Lennon, Aven’s large black labrador retriever who squeezes himself between the singers and is as gentle and well-mannered as his owner. The pair sing a cappella and in harmony. Distinct from elegies or laments, the songs are gently meditative, written to provide human connection and foster feelings of love and safety. They are not just for the benefit of the dying but for friends and relatives caring for them or holding vigil. Their singing is simple, intimate and beautiful. It is also utterly calming."

NEVER SAY GOODBYE; The New York Times, June 13, 2025

Susan Dominus ; Videos by Singeli Agnew, The New York Times; NEVER SAY GOODBYE
"StoryFile frequently works with foundations and museums, but it has already made interactive videos for several individual clients. In the future, the company intends to release a generative-A.I. app in which customers can create avatars that answer questions not provided in advance, by uploading a person’s emails, social media posts and other background material.
Matt and Joan preferred what they signed up for, which would be an avatar of Peter who answered only the questions that were posed while he was alive. Everything he said, they would know, was something he believed to be true, rather than an extrapolation. “It won’t change the reality that I’ve lost my father,” Matt said. “But it lessens the blow ever so slightly, knowing that when he does die, it won’t be the last time I’ll ever have a conversation with him.”...
Matt felt a tension between being moved by how real the experience felt yet also being reminded that it was a rendering. ...“It was a reminder that this is a human I love that I want to console. But you can’t console a video clip.”

I used to hate Mister Rogers. Then I discovered how much I needed him.; The Washington Post, November 22, 2019

Martha Manning, The Washington Post; I used to hate Mister Rogers. Then I discovered how much I needed him.

"Mister Rogers gave comfort. He didn’t sell it. He didn’t knock us over the head with it. It wasn’t cool or sexy or easy. He considered the space between the television set and the viewer to be “sacred,” something millions of children understood — and that their parents forgot.

That’s a shame, because we were the ones who needed Mister Rogers’s wisdom most of all. The big words, long explanations and instructions about how to be and what to do that we favored often gave us little solace. Instead, we needed an honest voice who considered the darkness and met it with hope, who recognized self-hatred and met it with compassion.

As a child, Mister Rogers became extremely frightened by something on the news and wondered how he would ever be safe. His mother gave him simple but profound advice. “Always look for the helpers,” she told him, with the quiet certainty that they could always be found. Who are the helpers right here, right now, in our troubled lives?"